Friday, July 30, 2010

Shopping 101

Never purchase more than four (4) items at one time. You may, however, take your first purchase to your mode of transportation and then go back into the store as many times as necessary. But always go through the same checkout line.

NEVER purchase things that are related.

For example, yesterday I bought a comb and six beer*.

Last week it was cheese curds** and heavy duty spray starch. Oh, and six beer.

*Saskatoon for a six pack.

**They weren't fresh. Fresh cheese curds squeak when you bite them. Just like little mice!

Thursday, July 29, 2010

The Iowa GOP is Loony

Adopted in December 1865, the current 13th Amendment of the Constitution prohibits “slavery” and “involuntary servitude” in the United States or any place under its jurisdiction. The Iowa GOP is not trying to overturn this amendment to reinstate slavery. Instead, it wants to reintroduce the “original 13th Amendment” first offered by senator Phillip Reed of Maryland in 1810. The amendment states that “if any citizen of the United States shall accept, claim, receive or retain any title of nobility or honor” from a “foreign power, such person shall cease to be a citizen” and “shall be incapable of holding any office of trust.” In receiving only 12 out of the 13 votes needed for ratification, the amendment was never adopted.

Traditional supporters of the idea are known as “Thirteenthers,” who seek to prevent those with the title of “esquire,” such as lawyers and bankers, from participating in government. But according to its spokeswoman, Danielle Plogmann, the Iowa GOP supports it as an attack on President Obama’s Nobel Prize win:

There are, of course, other implications of Thirteenthism, such as ensuring that the United States never again suffers the humiliation of having a president win the Nobel Peace Prize. That was just what the Iowa Republicans had in mind, according to Plogmann, who wrote in an e-mail that the plank “was meant to make a statement about the delegates’ opinion about Mr. Obama receiving the prize.” (Presumably they didn’t mind if, in the process, they were also making a statement about any American scientist or writer unlucky enough to win a Nobel.) Unfortunately for them, the Department of Justice looked into whether Obama needed Congressional approval to accept the Nobel under the existing emoluments clause, and based on the meaning of “foreign state” (which would not cover the Nobel Prize Committee) concluded that he did not.

Thanks to Think Progress

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

A Four Way Stop Dilemma

Today,as I was at a four way stop, the following scenario nearly happened.

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

Tuesday, July 20, 2010

We'll be OK

There's nothing that a bunch of rich white people can't fix.
Trust me.

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

South Dakota Wednesday

One Pelican is OK

but, a group of pelicans

blocked my path (the water did too)

Bulls in the mist

A bull on the wrong side of the fence


Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Where is Nowhere? Updated

The road to nowhere
THIS is nowhere!

No, I didn't stop!
Sometimes a tree grows in the wheat field
No school today
Caption needed

Thursday, July 8, 2010

Lebron Screws the USA (updated)

Update: the H has a great post about this

An American basketball player (LeBron James) will announce on a television special (ESPN) tonight which basketball team he will play for the next few years.

He is a high school graduate who went from high school to the NBA. No college. No advanced degrees. He will earn more in one game than most people earn in a year.

He is going to fuck ESPN and their advertisers and the American sporting public and they will enoy it.

No wonder the rest of the world thinks we are stupid!

Radio Lobo

NPR is my radio friend of choice. Today I was in country, wing nut, and "Lord help us, Jesus is on his way" radio land. So, the magic seek button found me 97.7 Radio Lobo!

Listening to commercials for McDonald's, Burger King, and other restaurants in spanish was.....interesting. My favorite was a Taco Bell ad for a "bacon club chalupa". I'm not ordering one either!

For your listening pleasure: Locos Desde Ayer by Inquietos Del Norte

Monday, July 5, 2010

Sunday, July 4, 2010

Republican Friends and How to Keep them

No matter what people tell their Democratic friends, everyone knows and even likes some Republicans. This can be a problem at work, lunch, happy hour and even dinner parties*.

So, if you find yourself in the company of several of the YTRBILTs**, remember to occaisionally bring up something that Repulicans hate. You don't actually have to participate in the subsequent conversation, you just want to appear "not liberal".

Try to choose a subject that you are neutral or even negative about, but that you know Republicans hate, such as soccer.

Republicans are especially fond of football and baseball, but tend to shy away from other sports. Top among these ‘other sports’ is the cancer known as soccer. Soccer’s threat to American men has been prevalent since immigrants began arriving on U.S. shores in the late 19th century.

Good luck, you'll need it.

*If you invite Rebs and Dems to the same dinner party, you are one tough person.

**Yes They're Republican But I Like Them

Saturday, July 3, 2010