Thursday, June 2, 2011

Tourist Season

Memorial Day in the USA. The start of that wonderful time of year.

Tourist Season (aka Fucking Idiots on the Roads and in Hotels)

As a professional traveller, Memorial Day to Labor Day is the time of year I have come to hate. I would rather drive on ice covered roads than deal with tourists!

The SUV or Minivan or Crossover or whatever, you load up with your kids and bikes and whatever else you can strap on or stuff in. Head down the highway, in the left lane, not paying attention to anything.

Every night I make it safely to my destination, check into my room, go have a quiet dinner (sometimes it's quiet), and back to the room to relax.

That's about the time the kids are running up and down the hall screaming and yelling, getting all of the dogs in the hotel (no pets allowed) barking as loud as they can. The parents immediately remedy this after motel sex (that's why the kids were in the halls in the first place) by screaming at the top of their lungs telling the little bastards to settle down or there will be a time out.

I'm too tired to finish this, but one last thing:

I can't wait for September to get here!

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